Keep Biological Men Out Of Women's Sports.

And why this is the issue I have lost the most friends over.

A few weeks ago I was inadvertently dragged into an online controversy by my friend (maybe former friend now?) Bravo host Andy Cohen. The context of the fight was over President Trump inviting a former high school volleyball athlete named Payton McNabb last month to his joint address to Congress as a way to highlight her story.

For those of you who maybe don't know who Payton is - she gained national attention for being involved in a volleyball accident in which she received a devastating head and neck injury as the result of a spike by a male athlete who identified as transgender. I have had the privilege of meeting Peyton at an event put on by the Independent Women's Forum last year in Philadelphia after being invited by my friend Tulsi Gabbard and a group of other amazing women including Riley Gaines to show support and advocacy for keeping biological men out of women's sports. Payton told me her story backstage and I got emotional listening to her relay the details of her injury, her time spent at the hospital, her and her family’s bravery - and the injury that marked the end of her volleyball career.

Back to Andy Cohen, he saw what I tweeted in support of Payton and responded:

"Surprised you’re buying into the vilification of the trans community given the real problems happening in this country, your previous ally-ship of the lgbtq community, and the fact that this non issue affects about four people in this country."

I have known Andy Cohen since I was twenty five years old and have been on his nightly Bravo talk show somewhere around thirty or more times since the show’s launch. There was a point in time when I was still a cohost on the view when I was asked to be a guest every few months. I have appeared on specials for Bravo, I have done promos for bravo, I even appeared on their one and only New Years special in the clubhouse surrounded by bravo stars and housewives, I was the only non reality star figure there.

I am friends with many housewives and have always had a fun relationship with the network and some of its stars. Hell, Erika Jayne performed on The View for my birthday one year. Throughout everything, including the election and then re-election of Trump - I have always had a very nice, cordial, respectful and I believed actual friendship with Andy. He is not someone I would consider part of my inner circle, but certainly someone I had a texting relationship with and would feel comfortable reaching out at any time to speak to. I like Andy, he is fun and very smart. He also has made a very nice living off of the backs of lots of women, many, many I assume agree with me on the issue of wanting to keep biological men out of women's sports and locker rooms.

I was surprised he tweeted it so publicly and didn't just text me privately to talk politics like he had done so many times before. I was even more surprised at the small shit storm it created after.

I answered on twitter: "Surprised you’re okay with violence against female athletes," and claimed that the player's account was "just one story" among many. "You have my cell, always happy to talk privately or publicly on either of our shows because these conversations are reductive to hash out on social media."

My phone immediately started exploding and didn't stop for a few days. The story was covered in entertainment and political spaces and I was made out to be a villainous figure who hated the LGBT community. A community that in the past I have had a unique relationship with because of my early advocacy for Gay Marriage, including appearing in the "no hate" campaign and also receiving many ally-ship recognitions and awards including a Trevor Project NextGen’s first Ally Award.

So, what changed as they say? Well, first and foremost I still support marriage equality, recognition of equality for all members of marginalized communities and the LGBT community under our constitutional laws. I also just believe in treating everyone with dignity and respect in general.

But what changed when it came to transgender athletes in sports? Well, for me it was a combination of having two daughters and the evolution of this issue on the national stage.

My daughter Liberty is an incredible swimmer and ever since she was born has been drawn to all forms of water and would literally stay in a swimming pool all day if I would let her. We put her in swim classes very early and she completed her ISR swim training at nine months old. She is advanced in her current swim classes and it is already a sport Ben and I have focused on fostering for her as much as possible given her clear talent and love of it.

When I think of her advancing in swimming, I cannot help but also think of a potential world in which she would be forced to compete against Lia Thomas. Lia Thomas for those who don’t know is the first openly transgender athlete to win an NCAA Division I national championship and won the 500 yard freestyle event in 2022 before being barred from competing in women's events by World Aquatics. There is now a famous photo taken of Lia standing on the stage towering over the other biological female swimmers in a moment that radicalized both me and 80% of the American public who agree with me according to a New York Times poll taken this February.

This is an issue about fairness and protecting biological women. I do not believe in any universe a person born a biological male will not have a physical advantage over a biological female, no matter what hormones they have taken. I do not believe any girl or woman should be forced to share a locker room with someone with male genitalia. I do not believe gender is a construct. I do believe people who identify as trans deserve dignity, respect and equal rights under the law. I do not believe they deserve special treatment or should be put ahead of any biological female in any capacity, most notably in sports. This is about fairness, protecting women and old school feminism.

And that ladies and gentleman is the third rail I grabbed a long time ago that has been the issue that has been the one that I have lost the most friends in my personal and professional life. It is also the one that has gotten me ostracized from the most places socially.

I think it is safe to say that Andy Cohen and the fine people at Bravo will never be inviting me to appear on anything at their network again. Not because I am not great (which I am) at talking about pop culture and reality television. It is because I do not support biological men competing in women's sports. That is enough to get you blackballed from places you have spent over a decade going to.

Many people have lost a lot more over this issue and this may seem small, but it saddens me nonetheless. It doesn't matter that the vast majority of the American public agrees with me, including The Real Housewives audience members who make the Bravo channel possible to exist. It just matters that a public republican did it like me and I need to be singled out as one of the socially unacceptable ones.

It is unfortunate, but as they say, politics ain't bean bag.

This is what I do know. I will die on the hill of this issue and obviously this is very small in the scheme of things but in my life it is notable nonetheless. All the being said, I will march, I will fight, I will be as loud as possible, I will be aggressive and always publicly support biological women in sports. Just yesterday a video went viral of USA fencer Stephanie Turner taking a knee in protest and refusing to compete against a transgender opponent and was subsequently disqualified from her tournament. Shortly afterwards, USA Fencing provided a statement supporting the transgender athlete. Stephanie's transgender opponent switched to competing against women from the mens team in December. We need to fight for Stephanie and all of our girls competing in sports.

Anyone who thinks what happened to Stephanie is fair is deluding themselves and living in a science fiction movie. Stephanie and every other female fencer deserves to compete against fellow biological women not transgender athletes who switched sports clubs a few months ago.

One of the things I am extremely grateful to President Trump is for his executive order requiring the federal government to "Keep Men Out of Women's Sports". In the order, the Trump administration vowed to rescind funding to any institution that permits trans athletes to participate in female sports. The order directs the Department of Justice to make sure all government agencies enforce a ban under Trump's interpretation of Title IX, a law against sex discrimination in education. Since then, the NCAA has amended its policy and now limits women's sports to student-athletes assigned female at birth.

This is a lose, lose culture war issue for democrats. I will never understand why they want to die on this hill. I don’t understand why Andy Cohen wanted to die on this hill with me. For what it is worth, he did call and apologize to me privately for the media firestorm, although we obviously still disagree on this.

As for me? Well, for whatever I have lost in regards to social clout in circles that don't matter, I have gained even more in friendships, relationships, sisterhood and fellowship with my new friends I have made this past year including Danica Patrick, Sage Steele and Jennifer Sey who walk this path of advocacy with me. Also, shoutout once again to my friend Tulsi Gabbard for being a trailblazer fighting in this space as well who has, is and always will be so much of an inspiration to me and millions of others.

This is an issue of equality, this is an issue of supporting fellow women, this is a civil right issue of our time. I am not hedging, I will not buck to societal pressure and I will not move. To everyone who fights alongside me on this issue, I thank you for your bravery.

I also know someday I am going to have a conversation with my daughters about why this was so important to me - for them. Hell, maybe I will even do it from one of Liberty's swim meets.

Love,

Meghan