Thank you for sharing this, your writing allowed me to connect with feelings I haven’t felt in a long while. I have lost count of my miscarriages, and as time goes on I am at peace and grateful for my three healthy children. I think it’s important for us to talk about miscarriage and share our stories, it seems so many of us have experienced this loss.
I hope the stigma and shame of NOT talking about miscarriages changes. This conversation certainly will open those doors. Grief is part of our human experience. Thank you for opening your heart to many and I pray for your healing and also, for whatever God's plan is for you and your family.
Thank you for sharing this. It's so difficult to share our most vulnerable selves. It must be especially hard for you because your public life is filled with people looking for weakness. I must tell you that when you left The View, I left too. You were the only one with any understanding of "real life". Even with your privilege, you are able to connect with ordinary people. Please continue to be real.❤️🙏
The pregnancy experience is so wildly different once you’ve experienced a loss or many. There is an ever-present awareness of the possibility the pregnancy won’t last, creating an ongoing balance act of fear and hope in each additional day. And each loss is different, different circumstances, different mourning processes, different life demands. I also lost my first pregnancy and was traumatized and devastated. My second was the loss of a twin, with a toddler at home. And my third and fourth came before the arrival of my third, one of which took place while having my second child’s baptism. I am sorry for the losses you’ve experienced. Thank you for using your platform to share your experiences. It is still not talked about enough.
I too have had three miscarriages. I stopped telling people after the first one that required a D & C. One day, I was speaking to a Catholic speaker at a conference, I congratulated him on their latest pregnancy and he said the baby’s name and that his wife had miscarried…more than once. I was speechless for a minute, then I said how sorry I was for their loss. I said that I had stopped telling people I was pregnant after the first miscarriage because of the pain of having to disappoint my family after getting them excited about a new baby. I have never forgotten what he said next…”they continue to share because it is important to let others know that the baby is a member of the family from conception, they immediately have love and wonderful expectations for that baby, it’s a REAL loss! ” He said people need to know they didn’t lose a “fetus,” they lost a member of their family. ❤️
Meghan, thank you so much for writing about this. I have not had a miscarriage, but am in my 30s with multiple barriers to conceiving (autoimmune and PCOS). I fear it’ll never happen for me, and am trying to find what meaning my life will have if it means not becoming a mother. I know there’s other options, but the grief process is still real. I also work with women on their family planning journeys as a fertility educator, where there is both joy and heartbreak. I really appreciate your vulnerability and bringing light to an issue that impacts women across the political spectrum. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Thank you for sharing - I am also an unwilling member of the miscarriage club and I remember once seeing the electronic chart at my OB/GYNs office and seeing something along the lines of Pregnancy #8 and I was shocked. I honestly don't know what it's like to see a positive pregnancy test and just be excited. You aren't alone - holding everyone who has gone through this in a special place in my heart because it's awful
I'm so grateful to you for sharing this. I've never understood those who ridicule women who want babies - couples that celebrate pregnancies and motherhood. It's like any type of deep love worth having...there's a risk of deep pain. I'm so glad you get to experience that love with your girls and I know you'll be reunited with your other babies in heaven someday. You're a good momma and don't let anyone make you feel otherwise!
My condolences on your losses. I had a miscarriage in 1992 and still think of that child. I find it difficult to answer the question, "How many children do you have?" I have three living children as well as the one I lost. I want to honor her (I think of her as a having been a daughter) but also want to have some privacy about the experience.
Thank you for sharing your experience. I’ve experienced a similar journey and found that the support of my female friends and mother was the most impactful. I felt bad for my husband because he wasn’t going through the physical loss and he seemed to pause his grief while I dealt with mine, first. I just shared your post with a coworker who came to me about her loss she just experienced. I think it helps to keep sharing and just saying that we are valid in our feelings that it just isn’t fair sometimes.
Beautifully written. Our life journey is not always easy. Life is so worth while when we can share our losses and our successes with those we trust and love. God bless Meghan.
I'm so sorry for your losses, Meghan, and for all of those reading this thread who have also experienced fertility struggles and/or miscarriages. It is its own kind of sisterhood. I also lost three pregnancies and it still pains me to think of them today, over a decade later. The grief around miscarriage is very real. The saddest part is that so many of us carry it silently and soldier on without much support. The nature of it all often means that we are denied the precious rituals that surround the loss of a loved one. For most, there's no body to bury, no grave to visit, no memories to share, no photos to gaze at. It's a deeply lonely feeling. In my case, there were some interesting silver threads within it all... It gives me comfort to think that I have three little angels waiting for me on the other side. I have a nine-year-old daughter who arrived after those losses and during her baby years I felt such a profound sense of gratitude. And relief. And an understanding that motherhood is not a right, and that I got very lucky. From all of that came perspective. During the intense first months of her life, during the sleepless nights, I would hold her close and thank God for gifting me this child. Those memories still move me to tears and help me through the harder days as a parent. I think of that as a gift from the babies who couldn't stay. To those who are struggling to conceive, I see you. You are in my prayers.
My heart goes out to you . It is a rough thing to go through . My wife had three . And thank the Lord she had three children too . But miscarriages are horrible both mentally and physically. Bless you for putting down in words your experience. Very heartfelt .
Thank you for sharing this, your writing allowed me to connect with feelings I haven’t felt in a long while. I have lost count of my miscarriages, and as time goes on I am at peace and grateful for my three healthy children. I think it’s important for us to talk about miscarriage and share our stories, it seems so many of us have experienced this loss.
I hope the stigma and shame of NOT talking about miscarriages changes. This conversation certainly will open those doors. Grief is part of our human experience. Thank you for opening your heart to many and I pray for your healing and also, for whatever God's plan is for you and your family.
Thank you for sharing this. It's so difficult to share our most vulnerable selves. It must be especially hard for you because your public life is filled with people looking for weakness. I must tell you that when you left The View, I left too. You were the only one with any understanding of "real life". Even with your privilege, you are able to connect with ordinary people. Please continue to be real.❤️🙏
I'm so sorry for your losses, and rejoice with you for your two beautiful blessings. Thank you for sharing your story.
The pregnancy experience is so wildly different once you’ve experienced a loss or many. There is an ever-present awareness of the possibility the pregnancy won’t last, creating an ongoing balance act of fear and hope in each additional day. And each loss is different, different circumstances, different mourning processes, different life demands. I also lost my first pregnancy and was traumatized and devastated. My second was the loss of a twin, with a toddler at home. And my third and fourth came before the arrival of my third, one of which took place while having my second child’s baptism. I am sorry for the losses you’ve experienced. Thank you for using your platform to share your experiences. It is still not talked about enough.
I too have had three miscarriages. I stopped telling people after the first one that required a D & C. One day, I was speaking to a Catholic speaker at a conference, I congratulated him on their latest pregnancy and he said the baby’s name and that his wife had miscarried…more than once. I was speechless for a minute, then I said how sorry I was for their loss. I said that I had stopped telling people I was pregnant after the first miscarriage because of the pain of having to disappoint my family after getting them excited about a new baby. I have never forgotten what he said next…”they continue to share because it is important to let others know that the baby is a member of the family from conception, they immediately have love and wonderful expectations for that baby, it’s a REAL loss! ” He said people need to know they didn’t lose a “fetus,” they lost a member of their family. ❤️
Meghan, thank you so much for writing about this. I have not had a miscarriage, but am in my 30s with multiple barriers to conceiving (autoimmune and PCOS). I fear it’ll never happen for me, and am trying to find what meaning my life will have if it means not becoming a mother. I know there’s other options, but the grief process is still real. I also work with women on their family planning journeys as a fertility educator, where there is both joy and heartbreak. I really appreciate your vulnerability and bringing light to an issue that impacts women across the political spectrum. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Thank you for sharing - I am also an unwilling member of the miscarriage club and I remember once seeing the electronic chart at my OB/GYNs office and seeing something along the lines of Pregnancy #8 and I was shocked. I honestly don't know what it's like to see a positive pregnancy test and just be excited. You aren't alone - holding everyone who has gone through this in a special place in my heart because it's awful
I'm so grateful to you for sharing this. I've never understood those who ridicule women who want babies - couples that celebrate pregnancies and motherhood. It's like any type of deep love worth having...there's a risk of deep pain. I'm so glad you get to experience that love with your girls and I know you'll be reunited with your other babies in heaven someday. You're a good momma and don't let anyone make you feel otherwise!
Beautifully said, Meghan. Thank you for sharing your journey.
My condolences on your losses. I had a miscarriage in 1992 and still think of that child. I find it difficult to answer the question, "How many children do you have?" I have three living children as well as the one I lost. I want to honor her (I think of her as a having been a daughter) but also want to have some privacy about the experience.
❤️ I’m so sorry for your losses
Thank you for sharing your experience. I’ve experienced a similar journey and found that the support of my female friends and mother was the most impactful. I felt bad for my husband because he wasn’t going through the physical loss and he seemed to pause his grief while I dealt with mine, first. I just shared your post with a coworker who came to me about her loss she just experienced. I think it helps to keep sharing and just saying that we are valid in our feelings that it just isn’t fair sometimes.
Beautifully written. Our life journey is not always easy. Life is so worth while when we can share our losses and our successes with those we trust and love. God bless Meghan.
I'm so sorry for your losses, Meghan, and for all of those reading this thread who have also experienced fertility struggles and/or miscarriages. It is its own kind of sisterhood. I also lost three pregnancies and it still pains me to think of them today, over a decade later. The grief around miscarriage is very real. The saddest part is that so many of us carry it silently and soldier on without much support. The nature of it all often means that we are denied the precious rituals that surround the loss of a loved one. For most, there's no body to bury, no grave to visit, no memories to share, no photos to gaze at. It's a deeply lonely feeling. In my case, there were some interesting silver threads within it all... It gives me comfort to think that I have three little angels waiting for me on the other side. I have a nine-year-old daughter who arrived after those losses and during her baby years I felt such a profound sense of gratitude. And relief. And an understanding that motherhood is not a right, and that I got very lucky. From all of that came perspective. During the intense first months of her life, during the sleepless nights, I would hold her close and thank God for gifting me this child. Those memories still move me to tears and help me through the harder days as a parent. I think of that as a gift from the babies who couldn't stay. To those who are struggling to conceive, I see you. You are in my prayers.
My heart goes out to you . It is a rough thing to go through . My wife had three . And thank the Lord she had three children too . But miscarriages are horrible both mentally and physically. Bless you for putting down in words your experience. Very heartfelt .